I'm gonna fess up and pour my heart out

[David]

I really need to tell all off you something very sincere. As most of you may know, I'm not actually half-british. It's a little obvious. This was just a small lie to cover up the fact that I actually am adopted, and I live with my aunt and uncle in California. My mother abandoned me in Korea when I was a baby for another man and stole everything my biological dad had: house, home, cash. My dad, suffering major depression, had to learn how to adapt to this, and left me to live by myself on the streets. For a few months as a toddler I'd live with my father's associates, a homeless man in Korea who was very kinda to me. I believe his name was Jaeyong Banh and I owe my life to him. Still, I've lived my early years eating Mcdonalds everyday and being a tool for begging. By the time I was 4, I was found by my aunt and uncle from America, who finally found out about me. My uncle is a nice man, tall and lean and british. My aunt was fairly quiet, nice, but had a loud voice. Afterwards, I was moved to America to recieve proper education. Adoption and the fact that I have no idea what neither of my parents look like anymore has really depressed me the past few years. School has been great and so has living with my step parents until recently. To this day, my mother has been treating me like dirt. My biological father and stepmom are siblings and my dad did something to make my stepmom pissed. I suppose I must have done something wrong too because she's been treating me poorly. She doesnt feed me, she doesnt talk to me, and she kills everything I enjoy. My stepmom has called mr names like "dumbass, bitch, asshole, fatty." and such. She doesnt care about me. Several times she tried to get me to run away. My stepmom has been spending literally thousands on sunglasses, purses, shoes, and other namebrand crap. But guess what? When I asked for my first computer, a cheap laptop, my mom told me "Fuck you" and has tried day and night to stop me from playing the computer. She tries to screw me up on school. I ask her to sign a paper and she ignores it. I therefore lose points at school. She has the worst yelling voice too. My mom tells me I should die and save the world some life. Today, she kicked my dog on the stairs and told my dad I did it. She never spends her money for others. She only spends her, my dads, and my hard earned cash. Thats right, I earned 300 dollars over the summer and my mom stole it saying I dont need it. My mom constantly blames everything for me. And I pray to God that Satan will go away from her.
So what am I going to do about this? My dads really nice, and rich. He's an important leader cor a software company. Problem is, neither of my parents dont come home until late. I also avoid my mom as much as possible. What should I do guys? I've constantly been cutting myself to ease the pain and I've been yhinking about drugs, but not yet. I can't prove anything to arrest her either. The only thig I can say against her is the blotches on my skin where she would smack my face and arm wih a rolling pin if I said no to her. I've been running from reality and using you guys to keep me from killing myself. I said it, I might kill myself if this thing with my mom doesnt stop. This has affected my behavior in the world and in the web. I've become untrustworthy and goofy. My grades are dropping from from A's to C's. I don't know what I should do guys. How can I not hurt myself when my own mother tells me too?

 

[Stratadon]

David, the worst thing someone in a bad situation can do is to attempt to get through it by him/herself. You made an amazing choice to share your situation with us and seek advice.

Teenagers don't always like their counselors at school, but this kind of situation is exactly what they spend years and years in college and graduate school learning about. Seek out the help of your counselor at school. It doesn't even have to be a counselor, but find an adult or teacher who you feel comfortable talking to and explain the situation.

Bottling up the anger and frustration and trying to just deal with it by yourself is what is causing you the most pain.

 

[Ustulo]

Tell your school counselor about this and kick that bitch's ass with social services.

 

[MotorKat]

If there's one thing I can completely relate to in this post, its the experiences with the parasitic, abusive parent. Unless you document EVERYTHING about what your step-mom has done to the tee, I can only suggest one thing: Stay Strong. For whatever reason she is choosing you as a punching bag for her stresses, insecurities and troubles. Talk to your biological father and legal dad about these things if they are willing to listen, but until you are of legal age the ball is mostly in Their court on what can happen to the situation.

I know that this reply may sound like a cop-out option, that there HAS to be a better option than just dealing with it. However, with being a minor there are only so many things legally speaking that you can do to directly influence the situation. I had to make some difficult choices back when I was in middle and high school on whether to call Child Protective Services and hand my dad's ass to them, or just deal and book it as soon as I was capable. On top of that, having to leave my mother who refused to divorce my asshole father made the departure to college even more painful. In my situation, the only thing I could do was just wait and sit through the shitstorm until I could legally leave it.

Staying Strong is difficult as a solo performance. Talking to friends, IRL or Online, even talking to total strangers specialized in discussing stressful situations like the Boys & Girls Hotline of America or school councelors can determine whether you make or break it. I'm proud that you made this post here online, where someone is bound to reply in a serious manner. If you need someone to talk to, PM me and I'll do my best to be there

 

[Casey]

Set up video cameras around the house and record it. Have proof so that adults understand that it is as bad as it seems. All I can say is do what I did along time ago. Live for yourself and the people you still hold dear. Things seem gloomy now, but remember that they won't always be. Times change and as long as you can weather them you will come out a better person for it. Drugs are not the answer, nor is hurting yourself. Those are temporary and when the affect they cause you wears off, you will have the same problems you had before, if not more. As for killing yourself, that's stupid. There are people out there fighting to survive everyday and while your life sucks, it would be a waste to throw it away. Live for yourself, and live for the people who can't live for themselves. I know this sounds pretty ridiculous, but its true. If you can't find a reason to keep going, then keep searching because I GUARANTEE there are plenty of them out there, you just haven't found them yet.

Also, try speaking with your father. Surely he has noticed a change in your stepmothers personality. If you record things let him see them. Most importantly, talk to him about how you feel. Your father needs to know how this is affecting you. If you still can't solve the problem, there are hundreds of resources out there. If your stepmother keeps this up, talk to your counselors at school, they are there for you. If it still isn't fixed, let one of us know here and we WILL find the resources to help you. Regardless to how much we argue, Team9000 is one big family and we help each other out here.

I wish you the best of luck, and please, don't do anything stupid. There are too many people that care for you, and it wouldn't be fair to make them worry. If you need to talk more, you know where to find myslef and everyone else.

 

[Wooty]

Regarding suicide -- If the thoughts ever start becoming too real, or too close, call 1-800-273-8255. Any time, anywhere. No questions.

 

[Skryter]

I can relate to this myself, even in my young age. I wont go into detail other than the fact that an abusive sister influencing her mother can cause a lot of physical and mental pain to a insecure teenager and that holding it in is never an option. I know it's a bit rich coming from a 14 year old but I'll give you some advice:

1: If you want to go to a form of child services I'd suggest recording her abusing you whenever you can otherwise she can refute any claims of abuse due to not having sufficient evidence to convict her and cause a more unstable situation at home.

2: As mentioned beforehand, try and speak to your biological and adoptive father when you get the chance and try and solve the situation.

3: Never let your emotions build up, from personal experience it can cause you to lash out which is one of the worst possible outcomes that can occur.

4: NEVER contemplate suicide, in some cases it may seem like a welcome solution but drastic ideals such as suicide can always be avoided. Talking to your school counsellor about your feelings can relieve yourself and anything said to the counsellor is confidential.

And finally be strong, if you look at the situation with a positive outlook eventually your situation will gradually become better.

 

[Zennai]

If I had advice to give that has yet to be posted by those above me, I'd tell you. What I can say is: I'm glad, actually...we're all glad that you gathered the courage to break this to us. Take ALL of the advice from the above posts. (Except Woot's "contribution.") The most important of said advice is: find someone who you can effectively converse with. Find a bunch of people be they some friends you know in real life, or the aforementioned school counselor, or members of Team9000 here.

I'm willing to talk. Yes, I display a mask of apathy and boredom, but under that facade I still care very deeply about my friends and family. And trust me, you've been one helluva friend already for how little of a time we could be called friends. Grab me on Mumble, or anywhere else. I can help. I'm willing to help. We all are. I'm sorry I didn't find this thread earlier.

If there's anything else I can leave you with, I'll say this:

The night is always darkest before the dawn.

 

[David]

Today at school I consulted my counseler and he gave me some advice: I am gonna join many clubs with friends to take some time off from home. This might mean less time on T9K, but I feel so relieved I can do something. I was also told to talk to him again if it gets worse but now I am busy everyday with friends! Obviously I could have though of this myself but I had no clue how many people would understand my situation. I'm going to wait until my mom settles down, but only God knows when. My dad says we'll spend more time together and he'll cut work just for me when I told him how I truly feel about him and my mom. I can't express how happy I am right now. Thank you guys so much, I think you guys are my saving grace(I know, it sonds cheesy).

 

[shooterty12]

Today at school I consulted my counseler and he gave me some advice: I am gonna join many clubs with friends to take some time off from home. This might mean less time on T9K, but I feel so relieved I can do something. I was also told to talk to him again if it gets worse but now I am busy everyday with friends! Obviously I could have though of this myself but I had no clue how many people would understand my situation. I'm going to wait until my mom settles down, but only God knows when. My dad says we'll spend more time together and he'll cut work just for me when I told him how I truly feel about him and my mom. I can't express how happy I am right now. Thank you guys so much, I think you guys are my saving grace(I know, it sonds cheesy).

damn, beat me to it. i was going to say stay in school long as possible. my principal had the same problem. her parents didn't give 2 shits about her and her neighborhood was as dangerous and it was her only choice. she joined every club possible, even if she wasn't good at it or even didn't like it. she never wanted to go home. she waited there ti'll the school closed. she was afraid to sleep at night. she tried her best to get into college. she was a very bright child but unfortunately she had no help with her homework, projects, or assignments at all, like i said her parents don't care at all. so she didn't have the grades required. all the teachers knew she could make it in college. they knew that the only reason she didn't pass was because of her parents. so they got together and broke the law and changed her grades. she survived college and passed it, and now here she is. running my school

 

[TheGurw]

Find $500 and I will solve your problem permanently.

That's enough to cover two bullets and airfare. I already have the rifle, and I'm happy to do it at cost (even though normal charge is $40,000). I'll even refund the cost of the copper if I don't use the second bullet (most likely, but better safe than sorry).


....I wish I could say I'm making light of a serious matter, but I'm not. I lived with an abusive biological mother for 14 years, before I finally just ran away. My father paid for my child support even after that, and I, to this very day, have never seen a penny of it - even the part before I ran away. Over $18,000 she stole from me. I was expected to be the perfect child at every outing I was dragged to (never allowed to play with the other kids, I had to sit with the adults and keep my mouth shut), and every time I wasn't, I was locked up and had my social life dragged away from me. I wasn't allowed a computer to even escape that way - and I couldn't buy my own because even with my shitty little job I had from 13 until just after I turned 14, I wasn't allowed access to my money. If my grades slipped from A+ to A, I wasn't allowed to even play with my little brothers until the grades went back up. And this meant I was expected to study constantly after I got home from school. She found every excuse possible to keep me from lawful visitations with my father, too. I found myself shrinking socially, squirreling myself away in the public library (my only allowed excursion when I was grounded) and sinking entire weeks into reading books - my only escape. I contemplated suicide several times - even went so far as to acquire a six-shot .32 and six bullets (in case I chickened out on the first five).

Finally I had enough. I waited until my final paycheck from the job I had came in, and that morning instead of school I went to the bank and withdrew it all in cash. I waited until she left for "work" (never found out where she went, but she was never gone more than 6 hours), came home, packed my few valuables (mostly books), and sat at the kitchen table waiting for her to come home.

She wasn't expecting me home early, so she almost instantly flew into a rage when she saw me. Calmly I pointed the handgun at her, informed her it was loaded and cocked, explained to her I was leaving, never coming back, and if she tried to contact me inside of five years I would kill her. I also made various threats relating to my younger brothers (treat them right or else), her new fling (they eventually got married, I feel sorry for him), his kids, and her parents. Then I picked up my backpack, walked out the door, and never looked back.

Abusive parents deserve death, in my honest opinion.




Be strong enough to say no to the offer. If you can do that, you can survive.

 

[bbgunshot]

David, I'm very sorry to hear about all of this. I personally am not adopted, but I have an adopted little brother who is almost 2 and I'm going to Bulgaria next week to meet my soon-to-be-new little sister who is turning 4 this December. I don't know what life is like being surrounded by that sort of chaos, my family has always loved me dearly and I've tried my best to love back. It relieves me that you still have faith in God, no matter how strong or weak it is, it is important that you hang onto this. If you hold onto this faith, then you too will remain strong, I promise you.

 

[shooterty12]

Find $500 and I will solve your problem permanently.

That's enough to cover two bullets and airfare. I already have the rifle, and I'm happy to do it at cost (even though normal charge is $40,000). I'll even refund the cost of the copper if I don't use the second bullet (most likely, but better safe than sorry).


....I wish I could say I'm making light of a serious matter, but I'm not. I lived with an abusive biological mother for 14 years, before I finally just ran away. My father paid for my child support even after that, and I, to this very day, have never seen a penny of it - even the part before I ran away. Over $18,000 she stole from me. I was expected to be the perfect child at every outing I was dragged to (never allowed to play with the other kids, I had to sit with the adults and keep my mouth shut), and every time I wasn't, I was locked up and had my social life dragged away from me. I wasn't allowed a computer to even escape that way - and I couldn't buy my own because even with my shitty little job I had from 13 until just after I turned 14, I wasn't allowed access to my money. If my grades slipped from A+ to A, I wasn't allowed to even play with my little brothers until the grades went back up. And this meant I was expected to study constantly after I got home from school. She found every excuse possible to keep me from lawful visitations with my father, too. I found myself shrinking socially, squirreling myself away in the public library (my only allowed excursion when I was grounded) and sinking entire weeks into reading books - my only escape. I contemplated suicide several times - even went so far as to acquire a six-shot .32 and six bullets (in case I chickened out on the first five).

Finally I had enough. I waited until my final paycheck from the job I had came in, and that morning instead of school I went to the bank and withdrew it all in cash. I waited until she left for "work" (never found out where she went, but she was never gone more than 6 hours), came home, packed my few valuables (mostly books), and sat at the kitchen table waiting for her to come home.

She wasn't expecting me home early, so she almost instantly flew into a rage when she saw me. Calmly I pointed the handgun at her, informed her it was loaded and cocked, explained to her I was leaving, never coming back, and if she tried to contact me inside of five years I would kill her. I also made various threats relating to my younger brothers (treat them right or else), her new fling (they eventually got married, I feel sorry for him), his kids, and her parents. Then I picked up my backpack, walked out the door, and never looked back.

Abusive parents deserve death, in my honest opinion.




Be strong enough to say no to the offer. If you can do that, you can survive.

Holly fucking shit bro. thats like fucking movie material and shit. holly fuck!

 

[Creeper]

Find $500 and I will solve your problem permanently.

That's enough to cover two bullets and airfare. I already have the rifle, and I'm happy to do it at cost (even though normal charge is $40,000). I'll even refund the cost of the copper if I don't use the second bullet (most likely, but better safe than sorry).


....I wish I could say I'm making light of a serious matter, but I'm not. I lived with an abusive biological mother for 14 years, before I finally just ran away. My father paid for my child support even after that, and I, to this very day, have never seen a penny of it - even the part before I ran away. Over $18,000 she stole from me. I was expected to be the perfect child at every outing I was dragged to (never allowed to play with the other kids, I had to sit with the adults and keep my mouth shut), and every time I wasn't, I was locked up and had my social life dragged away from me. I wasn't allowed a computer to even escape that way - and I couldn't buy my own because even with my shitty little job I had from 13 until just after I turned 14, I wasn't allowed access to my money. If my grades slipped from A+ to A, I wasn't allowed to even play with my little brothers until the grades went back up. And this meant I was expected to study constantly after I got home from school. She found every excuse possible to keep me from lawful visitations with my father, too. I found myself shrinking socially, squirreling myself away in the public library (my only allowed excursion when I was grounded) and sinking entire weeks into reading books - my only escape. I contemplated suicide several times - even went so far as to acquire a six-shot .32 and six bullets (in case I chickened out on the first five).

Finally I had enough. I waited until my final paycheck from the job I had came in, and that morning instead of school I went to the bank and withdrew it all in cash. I waited until she left for "work" (never found out where she went, but she was never gone more than 6 hours), came home, packed my few valuables (mostly books), and sat at the kitchen table waiting for her to come home.

She wasn't expecting me home early, so she almost instantly flew into a rage when she saw me. Calmly I pointed the handgun at her, informed her it was loaded and cocked, explained to her I was leaving, never coming back, and if she tried to contact me inside of five years I would kill her. I also made various threats relating to my younger brothers (treat them right or else), her new fling (they eventually got married, I feel sorry for him), his kids, and her parents. Then I picked up my backpack, walked out the door, and never looked back.

Abusive parents deserve death, in my honest opinion.




Be strong enough to say no to the offer. If you can do that, you can survive.

That is so rough. All I can say is props to you for braving it out and making the best with what you have.

 

[ConroD]

There's nothing I can say that hasn't already been said, apart from..

Everyone here, behind all the ponies, gaming, rapists and in vorprung's case(I mean actual case, this guy's crazy).. Dildos, will be around in some way or another almost every hour of the day, be it mumble, steam, the forums etc. Also if needs be, you'd be surprised at how many of us have an open door at all times, to anyone in need of it. A friend, a voice, pair of ears.. always available brah. Hell.. Even a bed... nomsaiyan? .

Help is never too far away. The biggest and most important step is reaching for it, from there it's all groovy baby

(Say everyting above in Austin Powers' voice.)

 

[JerzeyLegend]

There's nothing I can say that hasn't already been said, apart from..

Everyone here, behind all the ponies, gaming, rapists and in vorprung's case(I mean actual case, this guy's crazy).. Dildos, will be around in some way or another almost every hour of the day, be it mumble, steam, the forums etc. Also if needs be, you'd be surprised at how many of us have an open door at all times, to anyone in need of it. A friend, a voice, pair of ears.. always available brah. Hell.. Even a bed... nomsaiyan? .

Help is never too far away. The biggest and most important step is reaching for it, from there it's all groovy baby

(Say everyting above in Austin Powers' voice.)

So where are you guys when I need you?

 

[ConroD]

So where are you guys when I need you?

You look for me in the wrong places, i have constant access to facebook brah. Or you could just text me, not that i can text globally lool.

 

[TheGurw]

So where are you guys when I need you?

And of course, if you need a sarcastic reply involving dildos and buttplugs; or a few bullets; I'm available. I don't mind giving out my number, I have free international texting.

 

[mikeymagic]

That's fucked bro, everyone's told you everything already.

I've known like 3 people close to me to commit suicide so far and it is the most selfish thing anyone could ever do. Don't even think about it-. it's illogical and you should have a little more respect for the people that /want/ to be a part of your life, even in a small way.

we're always here for you if you need to vent, personally i love venting about all kinds of shit. Feel free to join in whenever :3

 

[David]

I know you guys can't help me, but I think sharing how miserable and horrible I feel right now will help.
So before I strayed from my mom, who was a fiend. She stole from me and hurt me. She ruined my life and made it so I can never live normally. Out of anger, she cut me with a pair of scissors and called an ambulance; she told them I was crazy. She doesn't care for me at all. An hour ago I was playing tf2 for the first time at my house, happy to be home. My mom marches in the room and starts beating me with a belt because she was drunk or something. I honestly think shes crazy now. She then broke my laptop(I think its broken) and took all of my clothes with her, saying that I wo t have any more than the few I have. I used to have 100s from hard work and jobs over the year and she stole it all. She said Im too stupid to get perfect grades and too fat to fit in clothes. Before I've just been living in my friends or girlfriends house but I just wanted to come back today. This one day. Instantly I fall back to a suicidal mood. I dont know what to do. Theres no safe place. I cant call the police because this story itself is too hard to believe. No one will believe me. The story of the Adopted Kid who gets abuse by his Mom isnt real, but is horribly real at my end. I see no future for me and I don't know where to hide. I've tried confronting my mom but I get smacked instead. My dad wont help. At first I thought hed help, but he is away for too long. And theres no way I can set up any surveillance for evidence because she sits in 1 room 24/7 and comes out to get food. I know suicide or drugs is a bad idea, but itd be easier to not live than do feel pain. I know this story is unbelievable and sharing it wont do much, but it feels good to let it off my shoulders.