Team9000 is a long and epic journey of one Australian's discovery of internet tropes
Vorsprung as we know me was catalyzed in the embryonic
guest to cool thread
Notice the brown nosing and poor syntax - those were unbridled years for sure
Early Vorsprung posts were punctuated by a severe lack of substance and / or knowledge of how the world works
This period which I like to call "the Spambrian" was only the start of an illustrious and embarrassing virtual career
This was brought to a head with
Koodle's buttrage regarding my useless
This brought on stimulation and transformation in the mind of one Vorsprung
Eventually Vorsprung adopted the alter-ego of the Pyro from Team Fortress 2
This was inherently a bad idea as for the next few years he would be laughed at and jollied through the tropes regarding this character
His masculinity was called into question multiple times and he resulted with image macros
These were a lawless time where the quality of conversation on T9K was far worse
Vorsprung developed quite an ego and became known for his sexual references and cliques of like-minded individuals
A good example of this is
this thread where Vorsprung makes some rather lewd suggestions
This is embarrassing for the author
Around April 2012 My Little Pony became prevalent on T9K and initially, Vorsprung was nonplussed
He partook in
occasional policing regarding equine images but this was the breadth of it
That example shows tolerance, and RSMV having a cry. This is largely demonstrative of a perfect universe
As time progressed, Vorsprung became less tolerant of ponies and more incoherent
He revelled in his notoriety and did
shit like this
What even is that. Why does he think he's cool
Then he got banned twice for not showing restraint
For the most part people missed him
...Nah
He had moments of glory but mainly continued to be a useless fuck
As time progressed, he has matured.
The standard of his wit has improved greatly. Now people aren't sure when he's taking the piss or not;
This is not always a good thing
He contributes meaningfully mostly with threads such as
this or stuff on
this. Sometimes with blogs like
this
He still maintains his top-dog standing of being the #1 useless fuck on T9K
With 7,866 useless posts and 5,990 meaningless likes he has a respectable presence on this online community
Where is Vorsprung now?
Wallowing in self-pity and self-indulgence, Vorsprung regrets his adherence to being "da official Pyro of T9K" and his binge eating
He enjoys being able to weigh in on conversations he shouldn't be part of and scaring people because he's spontaneous
He wishes that Woot would answer his calls I love you bbygrl call me
He wishes that people would give him respect so he can disrespect them without losing respect
He wishes people were quicker to realise he's taking the piss
He is too introspective and will be embarrassed by most of the things he's done in T9K when he's older and wiser
But all in all, T9K has treated him well
What has he learned?
>
Nothing absolutely nothing
> the importance of grammar
> people are impressed when you speak Japanese
> people don't like you all the time so you should abuse them
> Americans are backwards unfunny people who are far worse than Australians
> 'Straya stronk
> Gurw is horny and plays up his own talents for internet cred
> people do weird things on the internet
> the importance of social leverage
> 420
> ditch the Pyro motif it's flagrantly homosexual
> I'm actually not a bad human
Verdict
Who knows. Considering all forum activity amounts to nought and these people are lonely strangers that contribute nothing to society, who cares? Life is life and while spending time on the internet allows you to have fun and develop cynicism, things are good.
I love you guys.
:https://www.team9000.net/threads/this-is-my-engie-promo-app-lol-jk-ideal-engieneer-discussion.11208/
But I'm really grateful that this community actually has taught me something 
