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Well, I think it's about that time

NewspaperCrane

Well-Known Member
So, it’s come to this. I don’t know where to start, typically when I write something like this I just let my fingers fly right along with my brain, but right now I think my brain is moving too fast for my figures. My mind is pulling me in nine directions at once, and I can’t really say that I can follow any of them. This past week has been one hell after another for me, I think.

Maybe I should just start back at the beginning. I never used to be very well known anywhere on the internet. I was always just an anonymous name in the crowd. I used to hop from website to website looking for something I could never find… a home. Over the years I had found a few places to occupy me for at least a short amount of time, but none of them have been longer than Team9000. Perhaps that’s why all of this is affecting me so much. For a while now, I have considered Team9000 my home on the internet.

I find myself spending literally hours a day around here. Even when I’m not on mumble, I’m surfing the forums waiting for someone to reply to whatever threads I’m interested in at that particular time. So I can give some condescended reply, acting like I’m better than other people because I’ve been here longer, or because I’m older, or because I knew about Team9000 before it had a minecraft server.

Like I said, I’ve never really been very well known around the internet. I’m going to be honest, me being well known here happened more as an accident than anything else. Yes, I have the same join date as Wooty, but what isn’t so well known is the amount of time that I’ve been gone from team9000. To tell you the truth, the only reason I registered when I did was ollee or Ozy sent me a skype message telling me to. I registered, checked the site for a few days, but there wasn’t much content back then, and I really didn’t have a reason to stick around, so I didn’t. Fast forward from November to February of 2010. It was my first semester at a new school and in a new town, and I didn’t really know anyone. For some reason I randomly got back involved in team9000 (it was most likely because of a live cast, and got involved in a few events.)

Fast forward to the end of the school year, I moved back home after school was out and all but ignored team9000 again, only to return once more in September. I show back up and realize that people… like everyone… knows who I am. I begin getting promotions in the classic server just because I’ve been around for a long time and know the admins previously. This is probably the worst thing that could have happened.

It was around this time when I realized the reason why people weren’t drawn to me. I was always a follower. I was never really interesting either. I had no personality. So I did what any insane person, raised by the internet would do: created a character for myself. Since then I’ve kind of been living a double life.

The character that I created for myself is “Crane”. If “Crane” is my Batman, then “Tom” is my Bruce Wayne. “Crane” is a person with the ego the size of Texas, he drinks, he smokes, and he yells at people who disagree with him. He prides himself on being the alpha troll, and laughs when he does something wrong. “Crane” is not someone whom you want on your server, or even around your community.

“Crane” was originally created to make myself more interesting, but really all it did was make me into a jackass. There are people around here that love me for it. I spent so much time pushing the envelope and trying to cross the line that I didn’t even remember where the line was. I over react to a lot of things which don’t really matter. This is probably an extension of that, but I feel it needs to be done.

The way I have been acting as of late has been ridiculous. Looking at the things that I have said, and the things that I have done I can’t believe that it was me. I think the one thing that needs to be said at this point is “I’m Sorry” That’s really all I can say. No more excuses, no more scapegoats, no more rhetoric. I’m just sorry. Things should have never gotten this far out of hand. I thought I was taking the high road, but I wasn’t, I was further down in the muck than anyone. I’m appalled by this.

There’s so much more to say, but I just can’t put it to words right now.

I guess at this point you’re wondering the point of this blog post (or more likely, you skipped all of the way down to the bottom and ignored the rest of it).

I’m going to take a break from Team9000 for a while. This is what I think is best for the community. If you are interested in contacting me, you’ll know where to find me, it’s not that hard. I will also monitor this blog post for a while.

I don’t know when/if I’ll be back. It could be a week, it could be forever, I don't know. All I know right now is that I need some time away.

I’m sorry everything has come to this, I never wanted any of this to happen.
 

NewspaperCrane

Well-Known Member
The only thing that I ask is that there be no trolling in the comments of this post. It is my decision to make, and I have made it.
 

mcfar45

Well-Known Member
I wish you all the best Crane/Tom, It has been good knowing you here on T9K and I do hope you come back at some point.
 

moondoggy23

Well-Known Member
I wish there were some thing that could be said to keep you from leaving. I personally respect you, whichever person you are (Crane or Tom), because you've said some rather insightful things on here in the past. You're the loyal follower and defender of Team9000; always quick to set people who are being jerks straight. PS: You're still going to try to make it to PAX East, right?
 

Casey

Well-Known Member
You will be missed. Have fun Tom and I better damn well see you again or I will find you and I will take your soul. Then force you to get back on Team9000.
 

that_taco_guy

Well-Known Member
I'm going to miss you Crane. You are an awesome person, and you are like no other person.
I missed you on mumble, and It was nice that we got to chat again.
Remember that we <3 you, and we'll always be here.
I'mma gonna miss youuuuu,
-Taco
 

Godliberator

Well-Known Member
feel free to message me some form of contact other than team9000, you will sincerely be missed and if you feel it is necessary to leave then so be it, and although I cannot speak for everyone, I feel as though you are a just a big a part of who we are as a community no matter which persona you were at the time. Hope to see you back much sooner than later....or yuky will probably climb through your window.
 

MiniCacti

Well-Known Member
I have nothing to say that hasn't been said below, except for one thing. Speaking on behalf of all of T9K, (I hope) you have earned our respect. Goodbye and Good Luck.
 
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