'Cheer Me Up' Thread

drsheep

drsheep

Well-Known Member
Of all the threads that I'd like to see go on for several dozen pages and really hit it off, I feel like it ought to be this one.

It's simple, anything positive and uplifting should be posted here, and maybe people can one day come to this thread on a rainy day for some good times. Maybe you can tell a pleasant story or just post adorable gifs, if you think it can brighten someone's day, I'm sure it's well worth the while.

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v5Ki6.jpg



oh and if someone could explain to me this image embed crap you'd be an angel <3
am i doin it right?
 
NARRATOR: The Tale of Sir Launcelot.

FATHER: One day, lad, all this will be yours!
ERBERT: What, the curtains?
FATHER: No, not the curtains, lad. All that you can see! Stretched
out over the hills and valleys of this land! This'll be your kingdom,
lad!
HERBERT: But, Mother--
FATHER: Father, I'm Father.
HERBERT: But Father, I don't want any of that.
FATHER: Listen, lad. I've built this kingdom up from nothing. When
I started here, all there was was swamp. All the kings said I was
daft to build a castle in a swamp, but I built it all the same,
just to show 'em. It sank into the swamp. So, I built a second one.
That sank into the swamp. So I built a third one. That burned down,
fell over, then sank into the swamp. But the fourth one stayed up.
An' that's what your gonna get, lad -- the strongest castle in these
islands.
HERBERT: But I don't want any of that -- I'd rather--
FATHER: Rather what?!
HERBERT: I'd rather... just...
[music]
...sing!
FATHER: Stop that, stop that! You're not going to do a song while
I'm here. Now listen lad, in twenty minutes you're getting married to
a girl whose father owns the biggest tracts of open land in Britain.
HERBERT: But I don't want land.
FATHER: Listen, Alex,--
HERBERT: Herbert.
FATHER: Herbert. We live in a bloody swamp. We need all the land we
can get.
HERBERT: But I don't like her.
FATHER: Don't like her?! What's wrong with her? She's beautiful,
she's rich, she's got huge... tracts of land.
HERBERT: I know, but I want the girl that I marry to have...
a certain... special...
[music]
...something...
FATHER: Cut that out, cut that out. Look, you're marryin' Princess
Lucky, so you'd better get used to the idea. [smack] Guards! Make sure
the Prince doesn't leave this room until I come and get 'im.
GUARD #1: Not to leave the room even if you come and get him.
GUARD #2: Hic!
FATHER: No, no. Until I come and get 'im.
GUARD #1: Until you come and get him, we're not to enter the room.
FATHER: No, no, no. You stay in the room and make sure 'e doesn't
leave.
GUARD #1: And you'll come and get him.
GUARD #2: Hic!
FATHER: Right.
GUARD #1: We don't need to do anything, apart from just stop him
entering the room.
FATHER: No, no. Leaving the room.
GUARD #1: Leaving the room, yes.
FATHER: All right?
GUARD #1: Right. Oh, if-if-if, uh, if-if-if, uh, if-if-if we...
FATHER: Yes, what is it?
GUARD #1: Oh, if-if, oh--
FATHER: Look, it's quite simple.
GUARD #1: Uh...
FATHER: You just stay here, and make sure 'e doesn't leave the room.
All right?
GUARD #2: Hic!
FATHER: Right.
GUARD #1: Oh, I remember. Uh, can he leave the room with us?
FATHER: N- No no no. You just keep him in here, and make sure--
GUARD #1: Oh, yes, we'll keep him in here, obviously. But if he had
to leave and we were--
FATHER: No, no, just keep him in here--
GUARD #1: Until you, or anyone else,--
FATHER: No, not anyone else, just me--
GUARD #1: Just you.
GUARD #2: Hic!
FATHER: Get back.
GUARD #1: Get back.
FATHER: Right?
GUARD #1: Right, we'll stay here until you get back.
FATHER: And, uh, make sure he doesn't leave.
GUARD #1: What?
FATHER: Make sure 'e doesn't leave.
GUARD #1: The Prince?
FATHER: Yes, make sure 'e doesn't leave.
GUARD #1: Oh, yes, of course. I thought you meant him. Y'know, it
seemed a bit daft, me havin' to guard him when he's a guard.
FATHER: Is that clear?
GUARD #2: Hic!
GUARD #1: Oh, quite clear, no problems.
FATHER: Right.
[starts to leave]
Where are you going?
GUARD #1: We're coming with you.
FATHER: No no, I want you to stay 'ere and make sure 'e doesn't leave.
GUARD #1: Oh, I see. Right.
HERBERT: But, Father!
FATHER: Shut your noise, you! And get that suit on! And no singing!
GUARD #2: Hic!
FATHER: Oh, go get a glass of water.
 
Team9000 Talk Radio​
:megusta:​
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Random talk show host: Hello I am a reaper alien and this is Team9000 Talk Radio.


Random talk show host who's species in now known: As a talk show host, I will appoint random callers to speak up and make random conversations with random special guests. Soooo...... FIRST CALLER!

First Caller: Hello, what on earth is thy name my sister?

Random talk show host talking with a caller: Oh my name is Natasha Mclabiahaggen. I am a prestigious woman who stabbed her father to death with a crochet needle. Of course, I always wanted to be a p****star but now I got THIS shameful job. Anyway, what is your message?

First Caller: I am the profound James Bethusthian. I am the founder of the halucinatia cult.

Natasha: Oh I heard of that cult on the newspaper, heard they spent $10000000 on first-class condoms and then distributed it to hobos who can't afford them for they are in desperate need of making love without contracting HIV and feeling comfy at the same time! I am sooo touched!

First Caller: If you find our cult inspiring, then join us! We offer liberation from cultures and sexual conquest at prices YOU don't have to pay. We give you freedom to go to cabarets without paying, we give you freedom to go on the streets with no garments without getting arrested for nudity, we even give you the freedom to have a silicon chest without getting mocked! Join us my sister, join us and have liberation from CENSORSHIP!!

Natasha: Why, I find the fact that you said people get mocked for silicon chests utterly offending! :mad: It insults my beautiful, un-insured implants! Get off the lines and into reality buddy! I just read that all of your members have been arrested for "putting dorritos in a woman's butt" and a swat team is coming for you now.
(loud noises of someone getting kidnapped)​
Next Caller.....

2nd Caller: (Goth voice) Hello, I'm Melissa and I just killed my husband, I wanted to know if I'll got to jail or anything...

Natasha: Then seduct the policemen when they come of course! Soon you will find some handsome American policemen "playing in the sandbox" with you. Next Caller....

3rd Caller: Gimme a blow***!!!

Natasha: Holy Gracious!

3rd Caller: You F**** y***** G**** HJGT**** SJKK**** F**** You!

Natasha: Why of course I can help you! I Heard of an amazing mental treatment facility and sanatorium, it accepts even the most deterring patients, and only for $50 a year! You must admit yourself, it is sooo amazing! Next Caller.....

4th Caller: Hi, you know I have the same middle name as you.

Natasha: Oh Michael? Yes i find it a very sophi-

4th Caller: No! Marina! Well, I was called John by my parents but Marina is much more....

Natasha: errrr feminine?

4th Caller: No! French! I heard women think men with french names are sooo hot!

Natasha: @_o..... I should stop taking those pills. Well, Next Caller....

5th Caller: Hello, I wanted to talk about how nature hates poor people, cuz tornadoes don't like poor people...

Natasha: Yes just like me, I have three maids all working at minimum wage. I mean POOR PEOPLE LOVE TO WORK FOR ME!! Anyway this is all the time we have for today. Tune in next time and we'll talk about relieving yourself from crack. Goodbye.....

This show is sponsored by:​
Mercedes Tm​
 
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